MBA: Leadership Journal – Leading Change Through Body Language

Last week I went to a meeting with two attorneys. We were sitting in a meeting room at the courthouse. I noticed how the other attorney was dressed and behaved. He showed signs of nervousness more than signs of readiness – his coat was buttoned, his gaze was distant (it would fix on inanimate objects even though I was right there staring at him). He held his folio close to his body. He sat down at the round table at a 70 degree angle form me, his gaze in the distance, his coat buttoned, his arms crossed, his legs under his chair crossed, the folio on his immediate space on the table. I decided to “lead” him into open-ness since it would be beneficial for the discussion that would follow. I quickly looked at my own body language – I was purposefully very relaxed, shoulders back, and with an inquisitive gaze he would not meet. I couldn’t lead him from such a ‘distance’ in terms of body posture. I then mirrored his pose: I crossed my arms, put my legs back under my chair and crossed my ankles and looked away at inanimate objects – then I counted to 50 seconds. After that I slowly led him away form his pose. I uncrossed my arms, and some 30 second later he did the same, then the legs, then I relaxed. Then I looked at him and the other (my) attorney came in the room just as I finished ‘opening-up’. We had a good meeting afterwards. Now I wonder – all the books agree that body language expresses inner feelings and thoughts, but does body language influence them back too? In my example above, does this person’s feelings and moods change based on what I led him through? I couldn’t find any studies pointing to a two-way correlation – but hey, nothing beats feeling like a Jedi doing a Jedi mind trick.